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Empower Yourself – Nourish Your Soul

Empower Yourself – Nourish Your Soul

Instead of making goals for your business or material needs, why not set some soul intentions for the well being of YOU, your spirit.
I read it somewhere and thought: "what a splendid idea". So what's the difference between soul intentions and other intentions, or life goals?
For example most intentions or resolutions are kind of competitive. We want to make more money, do more work, be better at something, look better for others, in short have more and be more.

Soul intentions are about our soul needs, which is: more love, more compassion, more forgiveness and more acceptance.
Below are my soul intentions and if you don’t know what yours are, please borrow some of mine…………………………soul needs are universal🙂

I will do things that make me happy
I will float in hot water as much as I can
I will get at least one massage per month
I will eat food that nourishes my body
I will walk and go to the gym
Sometimes I will allow myself a burger, bacon and eggs and a cookie
I will find a spiritual group and 12 step meetings in Germany
I will connect more with real people in life
I will be creative
I will accept and love my parents and kids just the way they are, even when they annoy me.
I will be aware of what I do and how I react
I do whatever I can to be kind and of service to others
I will do the things I need to do even when it scares the hell out of me.

Ok, I’m overdoing it, but this is what I need to do in order to be content. Most of the items are incorporated into my life already, so it does not feel like “oh my god I have to do all this”. No it’s how I love to live my life. My life is a spiritual practice and sometimes it’s all great and sometimes it’s the pits, but its ok.

Sometimes everything is easy and flows like a miracle and the next day nothing flows. I’m learning that if I don’t get so attached to the good days, it’s not so hard to not get attached to the "not so good days". It’s all just energy, good, bad, negative, positive vibration.

It is very important to not make important decisions when angry, tired or disconnected. Self care is improving your connection to your life force and the more you take care of your body mind and spirit needs, the better you will feel.
We live in a world where stress, workaholism and self abuse is awarded. So it’s time to undo the damage and incorporate play, fun and some serious "self indulgance" into life.

Some simple tips how you can do it:

Do some lovingkindness meditation
Create a vision board
Keep a journal and write down your soul intentions
Create a ceremony about giving your vows to your soul intentions

Place your vision board or a poster board with your written intentions, where you can see it. You will notice that the more you will take care of your needs, the happier you will be. This in turn will attract more of the same energy into your life. It’s a miracle, it truly is. Make a commitment to yourself!

A simple lovingkindness meditation for you from Jack Kornfield.

May I be filled with lovingkindness.
May I be safe from inner and outer dangers.
May I be well in body and mind.
May I be at ease and happy.
May you be filled with lovingkindness.
May you be safe from inner and outer dangers.
May you be well in body and mind.
May you be at ease and happy

What have you noticed when you take care of your needs and you nourish your soul? Please leave a comment 🙂

How To Stay Positive In A Negative Environment

How To Stay Positive In A Negative Environment

You might say that it's not a good idea to hang around negative people and I would say the same. But sometimes these people are close family and we might not want to stay away.

For example parents: They might be getting old, in pain, scared and in a situation where they have to let go of control. Can YOU see how hard this is? I sure can and if someone does not have training in spiritual principles, or personal development it's hard to deal with these facts and the default might be: NEGATIVITY.

My choice was to move back to Germany to be closer to my parents. After living in California for 34 years, this was a hard decision, but somehow my feeling told me: Marita it's time to go back and be there for them. One problem is that there is a lot of negativity in my parents environment and I will need a strong practice and support system in order to not get sucked in.

Watching the news several times a day, complaining about the state of the world, the greed, the problems, the cheeting. Getting together with others, all this gets discussed and it's a vicious cycle of a hostile world, injustice, powerlessness and sickness. Wow it's no fun, I don't even want to know.

A toxic environment, but I make it my practice to be present and to stay positive, I want to be a "breath of fresh air". Detachment with love is the practice and I watch everything around me like a movie. The practice is to not react and to be loving and patient. Thank god I have a good meditation practice and support system of friends who will keep me on track.

I am so amazed and grateful about my progress. All the work with 12 step groups, spiritual programs, personal development and coaching have made such a difference in my life. It empowers and supports me through difficult times. The important lesson for me is to know that not everybody around me has the awareness to be on this path of forgiveness, acceptance and letting go and I have to accept this.

Living in a space of mystery and not knowing what tomorrow will bring is also challenging, to say the least. Living life outside of the comfortzone, having faith that everything is the way it's supposed to be and just flowing with whatever happens. That's the space where miracles happen.

My " Simple Miracle"

The beginning of December I applied for an apartment in Germany, I was hoping to be able to move in January 1, but I will not be able to move in until February 1. The thought of staying with my parents for another month was hard for me and for them. Now the miracle was, that I applied for US citizenship and the only thing left to do was my "Swearing in Ceremony, which I did not have a date for at the time. One day later my friend checked my mail and I got the date for the ceremony, January 8th. I booked a flight and decided to stay in California until the end of January. So, it worked out perfectly!

These miracles strenghen my trust in the universe and the more I notice them, the more I can let go of trying to control everything. What a relief that is.

What's your recent miracle?

Let Go Of Trying To Be Perfect, It’s Boring

Let Go Of Trying To Be Perfect, It's Boring

What kind of a reaction do you have when you read this?

What a stupid thing to say
I don't understand what she is saying
I like to be perfect
Hmm, never thought about it

Perfection is a strange thing, in some ways it might be good, but for most people it actually is a hindrance to get into action. Let's say you know you need to get something done and it is important, but you procrastinate and procrastinate…………..

If someone asks you why you have not done it, you say

I want to get it right
there is something missing
It's not the right time
I have to learn this and that first

And on it goes listening to the voice in our heads, that keeps us from taking action or completing things.

BECAUSE………..IT'S NEVER GOOD ENOUGH

I remember when I started learning about social media: one task was to set up Twitter and send out a tweet. I was in pure terror thinking that everybody out there in Twitter cyberspace would just wait for my 140 character tweet and scream: Look at Marita, it's so stupid what she is saying.

That was 5 Years ago, I am happy to report that I am not afraid to put myself out there anymore. Now I write articles, post on all social media, create silly videos and publish them on youtube. Nothing is perfect, but people have fun with it. I learened to overcome my perfection and life is a lot more fun and adventurous.

When was the last time you had fun with something "perfect"? Ok, professionals have to strive to do a perfect job, but I'm talking about a different kind of perfectionism. If you are a mechanic, a surgeon, a pilot or a book keeper, it's good to not make mistakes :–)

But in other areas it's good to lighten up and have fun, be creative, be playfull and enjoy the process.

There is a type of perfectionism that's listed as a mental disorder, psychiatrists call it maladaptive perfectionists. These people need to be the best at everything, and if they make a mistake, it’s a crisis. It’s also not just about how they perceive themselves, but about how others perceive them: they believe they will lose the respect of friends and colleagues if they fail. They have to hit all their marks all the time. Their need for perfectionism can sabotage their own success. What a sad life!

Below a quote by Anne Lamott about perfectionism.

“Perfectionism is the voice of the oppressor, the enemy of the people. It will keep you cramped and insane your whole life, and it is the main obstacle between you and a shitty first draft. I think perfectionism is based on the obsessive belief that if you run carefully enough, hitting each stepping-stone just right, you won't have to die. The truth is that you will die anyway and that a lot of people who aren't even looking at their feet are going to do a whole lot better than you, and have a lot more fun while they're doing it.”
Anne Lamott

What do you think about about perfectionism?

Believe In Your Potential

Believe In Your Potential

I love this quote by Marianne Williamson

“Our deepest fear is not that we are inadequate. Our deepest fear is that we are powerful beyond measure. It is our light, not our darkness, that most frightens us. We ask ourselves, who am I to be brilliant, gorgeous, talented and fabulous? Actually, who are you not to be? You are a child of god. Your playing small doesn’t serve the world. There’s nothing enlightened about shrinking so that other people won’t feel insecure around you. We were born to make and manifest the glory of god that is within us. It’s not just in some of us; it’s in everyone. And as we let our own light shine, we unconsciously give other people permission to do the same. As we are liberated from our own fear, our presence automatically liberates others.” ~Marianne Williamson

So what exactly does this mean and how can you believe in your potential?

For the people who are familiar with the law of attraction and spirituality this is easy to understand. For all others it might not make any sense. So if it does not make sense to you, don't worry, it's hard to understand and it might take some time, it's ok.

Continue reading “Believe In Your Potential”

When You Are Going Through A Hard Time It’s Important To Play

When You Are Going Through A Hard Time It's Important To Play

From the book: "Women Who Run With Wolves", by Clarissa Pinkola Estes, Ph. D,

"It is play, no properness, that is the central artery, the core, the brain stem of creative life. The impulse to play is an instinct. No play, no creative life. Be good, no creative life. Sit still, no creative life. Speak, think, act only demurely, little creative juice. Any group, society, institution, or organization that encourages women to revile the eccentric: to be suspicious of the new and unusual: to avoid the fervent, the vital, the innovative; to impersonalize the personal, is asking for a culture of dead women."

I love this book, it is so close to my heart. We cannot be reminded enough how important it is to play. Routine is a killer to our creativity. We all know this, but we still go for routine, no wonder that most women are stressed out, bored and have no energy. Too many things to do, too much work, taking care of others, too much cooking, too much cleaning, too much responsibility. But very little fun, no wonder lots of women start drinking or taking drugs, legal or illegal to just survive.

Continue reading “When You Are Going Through A Hard Time It’s Important To Play”

How To Empower Your Life

The word empowerment sounds like a very important word. But that's not the case. Just taking care of your needs is a healthy start. I made a list of simple things that will empower your life without getting into overwhelm.

Eat the right foods,
Read something inspiring
Drink enough water,
Get enough sleep,
Make sure you have fun
Take some time off for yourself
Enjoy a bubble bath
Exercise

Walks in nature, are relaxing and rejuvenating, if you feel bad, or stressed. Just go for a walk and try to enjoy nature without thinking about problems or whatever is wrong in your life. Nature can be a savior, the wind the sun, the rain, the trees, the ocean can replenish the well.

Meditation is also helpful, it gives you the moment to step back and create more awareness over when to react or not to react. It's empowering, to be in charge of your reactions. So instead of flipping off the rude driver in front of you, or the encounter with an unfriendly person in the store, you just take a deep breath and let it go, this is mindfulness in action. Congratulations you just empowered yourself:-)

Set boundaries with other people, know what you want and what you need. If you can be true to yourself you do not have to feel upset or feel victimized. Try and do the things you love to do, nourish your spirit, take time to play and have fun. Surround yourself with people who have the same interests and who inspire you. It is very hard to be empowered and motivated if you are surrounded by negative people, or people who do not want to get off their behinds. It's a downer, stay away from them!

Forgive more: remember the quote: Do you want to be right or do you want to be happy? It feels so much better to forgive than to be angry and resentful. In 12 step programs they call resentments: "The poison that you drink but want somebody else to die" Not good indeed. So if you forgive you can be happy and everything else does not matter, even if somebody did something terrible to you, forgiveness will make you feel better. Again, you just empowered your life.

Say what you mean and do what you say. Be in integrity, dont' lie, don't say you will do something and then you don't do it, it will make you feel good about yourself.

Feel your feelings, do not avoid them and drink, work, smoke, control or find other ways to avoid your feelings, they will get you anyay. You might as well feel them now and get it over with. I know it does not sound like fun, but feelings need to be acknowledged and they will persist and knock on the door until we listen. They are like entities inside ourselves that want to be heard.

Try to not complain, complaining sucks your energy like nothing else. Empower your life by taking responsiblilty for your life and your actions. This is a big one. Every complaint is a way to not take responsibility.

If you have other little ways to empower your life, please share it with us and leave a comment.

How Coaching Can Help In Your Life

How Coaching Can Help In Your Life

"We cannot teach people anything. We can only help them discover it within themselves. " Galileo Galileo

Do you sometimes feel totally overwhelmed by too many things to do, or one thing that's too big to tackle?
Is it so bad that you rather look the other way and not do it?
Are there some things you would like to do in your life, but you have no clue where to start?

Set up a business, online or offline,
Change careers,
Improve relationships,
Find fun ways to fulfill your life
Balance you life
Live a healthier lifestyle
Become more organized
Be more playful

Would you like to make certain changes in your life, but you feel it's too daunting without support?

If you answered yes you might want to look into the possibility of working with a coach. Just in case you have never worked with a coach, let's explore what it means and how it can help.

There are many different models and methodologies of coaching. Some may be designed to facilitate thinking or learning new behavior for personal growth or professional advancement. There are also forms of coaching that help the client improve a physical skill, like in a sport or performing art form. Some coaches use a style in which they ask "open ended questions" and offer opportunities that will challenge the client to find answers from within him/herself. This process facilitates the learner to discover answers and new ways of being based on their values, preferences and unique perspective.

Coaching is very effective and empowering to individuals who are absolutely ready to achieve results and goals in life and to pursue their dreams .

What coaching is not:

Coaching is not therapy. It does not focus on your past, or healing symptoms, such as of anxiety or depression. A coach assumes that the client is mentally healthy and able to work with the coach to develop strategies based on the client’s values and goals.

Coaching is not consulting. Unlike a consultant, who is hired to provide the answers, the coaches role is not to know all the answers and solve all of the client’s problems. The coach will frequently challenge the client to take action toward their goals, but does not” tell the client what to do”.

Coaching is not friendship. While relationship is vital to all of us, coaching differs in that the focus is focused on the client and what will give them maximum benefit.

I hope I answered some of your questions in regard to coaching, if you would like to try it, contact me and I will set up an exploratory coaching session, at not cost.

What to Do When Life Gets Challenging

Sometimes everything goes wrong, people leave us, appliances break down, cars break down, accidents happen, people don't do what you want them to do….. and on it goes.

One way would be to run away, (or we could) but that would not work. So what can be done? A change of attitude can make a huge difference and it will empower your life.

For example you cannot change the fact that something broke, but you can let go of being upset about it and focus on the solution: What can you do to fix it, yes it might cost money, it might cost time, but nothing changes the fact that it is broken, it is what it is. The sooner you stop focusing on the problem the faster you will feel better. It's a change in attitude that will make the difference.

Do you know people who keep obsessing about "the problem" for a long time? They talk about it to everybody they know and the energy gets bigger and bigger and the problem too. It totally depletes the energy reserves.

One way to stop it is to become aware of the fact and just stop and breathe in and out, it will shift the energy instantly. Sure it takes some practice to get there, but especially with a regular meditation practice it will become a habit very soon, if that is what you want.

Some tips that will help you

Focus on what is working
Nurture yourself
Be grateful for what you have
Don't give up

These are simple things to do and they will help you to feel better. Create some simple cards with positive words to remind you of good things and remember this too shall pass. It always does, you just have to go with the flow and do the best you can. One other thing that works great is to set reminders on your phone with positive messages a few times a day, they will make you smile. It's also a great time to make a vision board, which will help you focus on what you want and empower your life.

Try some of these tips and let me know how they work:-)

What To Do When Life Gets Chaotic And Stressful

Albert Einstein said it so well: “chaos proceeds order.”

Chaos: In this life, you have free will and you can make your own choices. You walk on the path established by your spiritual “blue print”. But like all creation, once you’re “playing” in life, situations present themselves that require choices. Your free will and choice are the chaos in your life. We only hope that we make the best choices and decisions for the evolution of our soul and spiritual growth.

These might be big words and if you choose to believe this theory great and if not it’s great too, it’s up to you.

Life can get pretty crazy sometimes especially when unexpected upsetting things are happening. Sometimes it feels like these periods do not end. It’s like a series of messes, upsets and often they include accidents and illnesses.

Do we know why? No we do not, but it’s important when you feel that chaos is coming, to step on the break and calm down. Meditate, do yoga, take care of yourself in whatever way you can, say prayers, mantras and affirmation. Talk kindly to yourself, listen to inspiring soothing music and audios, read happy books and most of all slow down, do not run, do not get stressed out and remember to breathe in and to breathe out. Always go back to your breath.

Stay away from non-supportive people and be as much in a positive supportive circle of friends as you can. It is essential to find balance within yourself, so you have to do whatever it takes to get yourself into a peaceful state.

Do it as long as the chaos lasts, it will be followed by something calmer if you learn to ride the stormy waves and remember that the sun always comes out again. We need these chaotic times to grow. That’s a good way to look at it, it’s more empowering than feeling like a victim.

There is actually another universal law: The law of Catastrophe: Also referred to as the stage of drama/trauma. This is an absolute necessity for the evolutionary process, when the seed cracks and growth is permitted to begin. This occurs in the human experience, and in nature.

What do you do to keep your calm when life is stormy?

How to Live Your Best Life!

“Eliminate something superfluous from your life. Break a habit. Do something that makes you feel insecure”. Piero Ferrucci

I know that there are lots of ways to live your best life. But I am talking about a life of purpose, a fulfilled life, a fun life, an exciting life, a magical life, a prosperous life, a life full of love.

First of all I like to say that unfortunately we do not learn this at home, in school or anywhere. I can only say: Blessings to the people who grew up with wisdom. Instead most of us learned how to fit in, how to memorize, how to endure, how to suffer, how to be small, how to be good. Yes this sounds frustrating and some might say: what’s the use? This is the way it is and there is nothing I can do about it.

Well the first step is to accept this fact and to do something different. The miracle is simple, you learn how to be aware of your patterns and step by step you practice to change your attitude about them. Yes, it is possible, we are not our patterns, we have incredible potential that is hidden inside of us, just waiting to be unleashed. Wow, what thoughts come up when you hear this?

Fear
Disbelief
Anger
Curiosity

Depending on what comes up for you, it will be clear if you accept the fact that you are the creator of your life, or you are not ready to accept it. Accepting it comes with a huge responsibility and not everybody is ready for it. Wherever you are is just fine. If you are curious: I can only say congratulation!!! you are ready for step 2. So what can we do to change our attitudes and behavior?

Awareness
Mindfulness
Give yourself some time before you react
Consciously choose to do something different
Celebrate each success, no matter how small.
Have you heard the phrase: Your mind is a terrible master, but a great servant? Learn how to play in life, how to take every game in your life as an opportunity to grow;
Bring creativity into every aspect of your life,
Start a simple meditation practice,
Surround yourself with positive people
Unclutter your mind and your space.
Do something new
Be grateful for your life.

If you do these simple things repeatedly, you will change your life step by step. Let me know how it’s going, I love to hear your stories. Leave a comment at the end of the post.