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What Makes You Come Alive?

What Makes You Come Alive?

What Makes You Come Alive?

Hello my friends, I hope your holidays were peaceful and nourishing and that 2015 will be a great year for YOU all. I would like to start my new blog series with my favorite question: What makes you come alive, or in simple words: what gives you great, vibrating positive energy?

“Don’t ask what the world needs. Ask what makes you come alive, and go do it. Because what the world needs is people who have come alive.” Howard Thurman

Oh, what a fascinating question. How do you feel when you hear it? Did anybody ask you this question before?

  • Does it irritate you?
  • Does it inspire you? 
  • What else do you feel?

Just to be honest: if anybody would have asked me this question 10 years ago, it would have irritated me. In those days I had very little awareness and would have translated it with: am I still breathing? What a stupid thing to ask? Hmmm, yes that was me then πŸ™‚

Now I get excited and I want to mention all the beautiful things that make me come alive. Deep meaningful conversations, helping other people believe that they actually can change and live their dreams. Help someone to be open to see their own greatness and to own their own value.

Sharing insights that inspire others, to know that there is always the possibility of a wonderful life. Knowing that most limitations are self made and can be overcome.

I love it when I can support people to take care of themselves by eating healthy foods, being mindful, excercising, enjoying nature. I love to hang out with like minded people where I get support and inspirations.

Wait there is more: going on little adventures, even when it's just a new hike or I explore some new areas with my bicycle. I get excited when I do something different, learn something interesting, take a new class, meet someone new.

Feeling alive, is enjoying the simple things in life, expressing ourselves, being creative, being playful……. just for the heck of it!

Now let's explore what drains energy.

For me the biggest energy drain is negativity, it totally zapps me, being around gossip is bad for me too, just like judging others or being judged. Tiredness and being around uptight people who don't understand me is bad too.

When I don't get fresh air and can't exercise it drains me, when I am dishonest or get angry it drains my energy, noise and negative news ………..Well I'm sure the list goes on but I will stop here. If you come up with other goodies please share them with us.

So what makes you come alive? Please leave a comment to share with others.

PS: Don't wait to do all these good things until you retire, start NOW.

English is not my first language please forgive twisted grammar and misspelled words πŸ™‚

 

Why Is It So Hard To Try New Things?

Why Is It So Hard To Try New Things?

 

Why Is It So Hard To Do New Things?

 

How do YOU feel when you desire to make changes in life. Do you feel ecstatic, do you feel anxious, or do you you feel neutral about it?

 

The fact is that changes are very hard for most people, that's why they rather stay in painful situations. Even if the change comes with the promise of a great life, it gets ignored and pushed onto the "famous back burner."

 

Do YOU know "someone" who stays in a miserable job, a bad marriage, hangs out with friends who are not a pleasure to be around, but holds on and on and complains and complains, but does not do anything about it?

 

Why is that? Sometimes the job isn't even paid well, so what the heck is going on? Could it be security, or better said the illusion of security? The job might be gone tomorrow, the company might be downsizing, the owner might be changing, the new boss might not like you. Job gone anyway…………………there is no security and it's better to face it.

 

Knowing this might help YOU with stepping out of YOUR comfort zone and experiment with new things. Maybe it's looking for another position, maybe it's finally creating the business YOU always wanted to have.

 

Yeah why not, it's good to face the fear head on and do it. Life is short and too precious to be lived in comfortable misery.

Find some helpful tips below, to be more courageous and start to initiate some life changes, even small ones.

 

  • Find a group of other people who want to do the same

  • Get some motivating inspiring books

  • Participate in some personal growth seminars

  • Get a coach

  • Don't tell you dream buster friends, you know the "ones" who don't dare and do not want their friends to dare either

 

It is very hard to do it alone, YOU need to have people who believe in YOU and support YOU. I myself initiated several major life changes in my life.

 

When I was 24 I moved  from Germany to California, started 4 businesses. Around 52 I left my husband, started on a quest to find my life purpose and moved back to Germany when I was 58.

By the way in case YOU wonder….I found my life purpose πŸ™‚

 

Every little step was scary as hell, but I did it and know that YOU can do it too.

Overcoming the fear and the resistance is the first step……………..This sounds weird but it's true, the fear and resistance will always be there, so there is nothing to get rid of or overcome. The only thing that can be done is to not let it stop YOU.

How can we do that?

 

Feel the fear, accept it welcome it and tell yourself that it's ok to try a little experiment, or venture out into new territory. It's ok, no lion will come and eat YOU πŸ™‚

 

The more experiments YOU make the more empowered YOU will feel.

Really…. what do you have to lose, there is not security to hold on to, it’s an illusion.

 

Try a session with me and find out if YOU might get inspired to discover something new.  Go to the contact tab and e mail me to schedule a 2 part session, it's my gift to you. I can't wait to meet YOU.

 

 

 

How To Discover Your Super Powers

How To Discover Your Super Powers?

 

How To Discover Your Super Powers

Sounds great doesn’t it? Superman powers, Yoda powers, Angelic powers, Psychic powers, Divine powers. I sure want them, what about YOU?

Theses are actually not the powers I would like to talk about today….. The super-powers I am talking about are very real and yes, every human being has them. They are energy forces within your system that youl have access to.  

There is a trick though…….you must be aware of them. Some of these super powers are conscious and some are subconscious, but even knowing about the subconscious ones will help you in your life as long as someone points them out to you.

My coach introduced me to human design and I found it soooo fascinating that I started to immerse myself into studying and now I get great results using some aspects in my coaching.

Ok, now the big question: what is it and how can this be of practical use for you? …. A human design chart is an interesting looking chart based on many aspects from Astrology, I Ching, Kabballah and Chakras.

It’s called “a system where science meets spirituality”. The most important fact is that when you learn about your uniqueness and how to express your uniqueness, you will be able to create a great life.

With work that you love, people that support and stimulate you, a healthy body and mind and the feeling of being alive. It will help YOU

  • Discover Your gift,
  • Discover Your purpose,
  • How to work with challenges
  • Create a fulfilled and balanced life
  • Make good decisions

One of my superpowers is my “gut feeling” a built-in guidance system, so as long as I listen and I am aware of it; my gut feeling tells me what I should focus on and what to let go of. I can’t go and make things happen I have to wait until something happens that awakens this gut feeling and then I can respond. This was a life saver for me, because I always tried to make something happen and when it did not work I was FRUSTRATED as hell.

Another superpower is my curiosity, which is always interested in things, in new programs, new ways of being, travel, transformation and sharing with people what I just learned. For years I was trying to be an expert and it actually killed my creativity. My unique way of presenting myself is to share my curiosity with others and stimulate them with my creative flashes.

The last one is my sense of timing… I was born and raised in Germany with never ending schedules and rules; when I had to what.  My unique design is the opposite; I have to follow my own rhythm in order to be happy, I have to “go with the flow”. It is essential for my well-being to honor this. As a result of not knowing this, I always thought that there is something wrong with me. Now that I know, I can live my life accordingly and not schedule every minute of my day.

Now I leave unscheduled time to do whatever inspires me; well yes…. sometimes it’s doing the laundry πŸ™‚

Can you see the practical use in your life? I can’t even tell you how good it was to know this………….. It has changed my life.

One other part is that my feeling of self-value fluctuates depending on who is in my environment, so it’s not my stuff. When I feel low self-worth I sense whatever people feel who are around me, this energy affects me. Being aware of this has helped me to look at feelings from an observer perspective. What is mine and what is yours and I do not have to be so affected by everything.

Ok my friends this is only a very small part of how to create a great life, there is a lot more to it. Are you ready to change your life from blah to great? Contact me and sign up for a complementary, 2 part exploratory session, where you will meet your own superpowers………..wow, how awesome is that?

                                    Blessings

                                                 Marita

                      

Over 50 Happy and Fit

 

over fifty happy and fit

 

Over 50 Happy and Fit

Do YOU remember when YOU were young and thought that women over 40 are very old? I sure did and now that I am almost 60………. it's not old at all.

How do YOU feel about your age, the state of YOUR body and YOUR mind? Are YOU happy with YOUR life? If not, what do YOU do about it?

I come from a background where I heard, and for that matter, hear the following sentence a lot: Things are the way they are and I am the way I am and that's it……….no room for growth πŸ™‚

These days I don’t have to accept this statement as truth any more. It's empowering for me to be fit and happy and to create my life the way it works for me.

I started making changes  when I was 50 and it has been a marvelous, but also a painful journey of self-discovery. But to be honest even the pain was ok, because it helped me feel my feelings.

My life up to that point was ok, or at least that's what I thought………….

Turning 40 I was middle aged-plump, I weighed about 160 pounds and did not feel good in my skin. Eventually I signed up for the gym and did a 3 day routine, lost some weight but not much……..Turning 50, I went through a total crises and changed my diet, my lifestyle. some of my friends, my old way of thinking and more.

I dropped French bread and replaced it with dark German whole grain bread, I quit alcohol, smoking and comfort food……… Or to be honest I still had comfort food sometimes and here and there I had a glass of wine with dinner.  I believe that it's too hard to be too strict with myself; there are always exceptions to my rules.

My new diet included  more steamed vegetables and salads, and water replaced juices. The interesting thing was that I quit smoking but did not have a desire to binge eat. That was a miracle, It probably was due to the fact that I practiced meditation and lots of methods to help me be aware of what I think and what I do.

These programs and teachers helped me:

  • Mind power with John Kehoe
  • Mindfulness meditation
  • 12 step programs
  • Byron Katie
  • Louise Hay
  • Eckhart Tolle

Now that I'm 59, I still keep up my gym routine, I found a class that I love. A mix of Yoga, Tai Chi and Chi Gong. I do weights and I love power plate exercises, which also helps with osteoporosis… or so I heard. I love to ride my bike and go for walks.

One of my other favorites is 5 rhythm classes, but so far I have not been able to find it in my town in Germany, although I could take the train to Cologne………..It's funny, when I lived in the state a one hour commute was normal. At times, I would do it every day, now I think it's too hard….I have to meditate on this one………..Anyway, it’s important  to make it fun and keep it exciting.

Yesterday I met a woman at the gym, she is 62 and has the body of a 30 year old, I kept noticing her and thought wow, this is amazing……… she inspires me. We started chatting about life, what we do in order to keep our bodies fit and how we stay inspired and happy.

She told me that she works with a hospice service as a volunteer which reminded me that I wanted to volunteer for a hospice service for a long time, but keep talking about and have not done it. So now that I got the contact information of the organization that does the training, I will talk to them.

For me this was another sign that it's something I should do. Believe it or not I've been thinking and talking about it for years……………….I believe in signs, if I want to do something and somehow reminders show up out of the blue, it's my sign to DO IT. This is part of my "spiritual fitness."

To recognize the signs, follow my intuition and my gut instinct. If I live my life according to these guidelines I’m in tune with myself. Meditation and self-reflection are great tools to help strengthen these qualities.

How do YOU keep your mind and your body fit? Please leave a comment I love to read them.

How to Make Decisions From the Heart

 

How to Make Decisions From the Heart

 

How to Make Decisions From the Heart

Hello my friends…I have spoken to many women who are going through major life changes and there is always one common challenge………….What do you think it is?

The most common one is: “not knowing what to do next”. Was that the one YOU picked too? I’m sure there are others but let’s focus on this one.

So, what feelings come up with not knowing what to do next?

  • Feeling stuck
  • Being confused
  • Getting angry
  • Having anxiety attacks

These feelings have something in common; they don’t feel good……………… but they are part of a normal process. “It just is what it is” and somehow it needs to be accepted, there is nothing else that can be done to speed it up. Resisting it will just make it worse.

One process that helped me a lot when I went through these phases was to get in touch with my intuition. By doing daily meditation and going for walks alone, we can get in touch with our body and our heart. It will empower YOUR life

Intuition is listening to our body language. What is the heart telling us? This body language is not very clear and we have to learn to interpret it. For some people it’s hearing things, for some feeling, for some it’s seeing. Whatever sense it is, it is not very loud, so it's very important to get to know the little voice inside.

What exactly is intuition?

Intuition is the ability to acquire knowledge without interference or the use of reason. The word intuition comes from Latin verb intueri which is usually translated as to look inside or to contemplate. Intuition is thus often conceived as a kind of inner perception, sometimes regarded as real lucidity or understanding.  Cases of intuition are of a great diversity; however, processes by which they happen typically remain mostly unknown to the thinker, as opposed to the view of rational thinking. Intuition provides views, understandings, judgements or beliefs that we cannot in every case verify or rationally justify.

The quieter we get the better it can be heard, seen or felt. There are also some good books out there to help improve our intuitive sense. I just read “Practical Intuition” by Laura Day.

Here a little excerpt from the book:

As the end of the second millennium draws near, the limitations of logic, rationality and the scientific method as the sole means of guiding our lives are becoming all too painfully clear. Increasingly our world is turning to modes of perception and understanding that don’t rely on evidence presented to our senses, modes such as intuition and faith……………….

Intuition has a dubious reputation in these times Conventional wisdom dismisses it as something intangible, mystical, unreliable-and hence the province of women. Men, to the extent that they are allowed intuition at all, have hunches or gut responses, or instincts.

These are myths and misconceptions. Women are not more intuitive than men. Perhaps because intuition was not thought to be a rational process it was attributed to women, whereas rational thought was assumed to be the province of the male brain…………….

Below are some simple exercises to help you become more intuitive

  • Find a comfortable place to sit, or lie down
  • Follow you breath and count one on the inhale and two when you breathe out
  • When you are relaxed identify a situation that you would like more insight about
  • Be focused on the event or situation and just keep breathing
  • Ask for a direct intuitive answer
  • Let go of the outcome

Who are you asking? Well I would say: your higher self, the field, the universe, or a higher power. Whatever it is for YOU

Now, how will the answers come?

They come through people, things that happen in your daily life, a newspaper article, you are reading, a conversation you are overhearing, something you read online, or something you see on TV. The most important thing is to always be aware of YOUR surroundings, everything you see, sense, hear or feel might have something to do with the answer.

I love this way of living life, it’s magical. Please tell me about your experience with intuition and how you get your answers. The more intuitive you get the more you will trust yourself and love yourself too, so start now πŸ™‚

Over 40 and Going Through Major Life Changes

Life changes over 40

 

Over 40 and Going Through Major Life Changes

No…….. I'm not talking about menopause, although that's a major life change too and it might be part of it. What I’m interested in is what happens when; the kids are moving out of the house, the husbands might be too, maybe a family member died……………… we might be unhappy with our career, or we remember this one thing that we wanted to do for a long time………

It’s the time in life when spirit knocks and is waiting for us to change gear and take a different path. It’s very important to listen to this. We all know that life is short and that it can be over at any minute. Two of my friends just died one was younger than me, one was 63. So we better be happy and do what we love to do……

Below is how my life changed direction when I turned 50

 

“God gave us all a gift, Using this gift is our gift back to God.

~Julia Cameron, The Artist’s Way

Continue reading “Over 40 and Going Through Major Life Changes”

The Power Of Vulnerability

The Power of Vulnerability

 

The Power Of Vulnerability

My friend and meditation teacher Claudia, sent me the link to this video. What a beautiful story and so well presented by Brene Brown, I just love it. I also decided to write less and offer you more thought provoking videos to have more fun…………..

Do YOU like the idea?

Researcher and storyteller Brene Brown is telling a story about vulnerability and how it affects the quality of our lives, she has a great sense of humor too……. I hate to say it but most scientists are not so funny……… but more dry………ooops  that was a judgement. I would like to use less judgment in my life, which is easier said than done, but I am aware of it, that's the first step. It's all a process πŸ™‚

So what is vulnerability and how do we deal with it?

Most of us do not want to have anything to do with our own vulnerability or other people’s vulnerability, or better said we run the other way when we are confronted with it.……….

But the sad truth is, that the more we are denying our vulnerability the more we deny other qualities, like aliveness, creativity, joy and self-expression.

We all want to belong, to be loved and to be connected to others. We are trained to perform, to hide our feeling, to be strong to pretend we are perfect, to know it all, to never ask for help, sounds familiar?

So what do people do in order to not feel these feelings?

For example: eat, drink alcohol, take drugs, shop, work, rage, try to be perfect, complain, gamble, sex……….of course I'm talking about excessive behavior, yes all this numbs the stuff we don’t want, but also all the good feelings that make life worth living.

So what do we want?

  • To be loved
  • To be seen
  • To be heard
  • To be enough
  • To be accepted the way we are
  • To express our selves

Yes, it's that simple. If you can think of anything else let me know, I will stop now and let you enjoy the video πŸ™‚

Are YOU ready to dive into a great new life? This might be start  πŸ™‚

What Do You Do When You Feel Like The Lights Are Out?

What do you do when you feel like the lights are out

What Do You Do When You Feel Like The Lights Are Out?

Of course this is meant in a metaphorical sense πŸ™‚ When I say lights I mean; creativity, happiness, aliveness, a good sense of self and motivation. It does not feel good, "when the lights are out", but unfortunately it happens. I just experienced an episode………….. Everything was fine, I got a lot of projects done, had good insights, was full of creative energy and then………

  • I found out that 2 wonderful people I knew, died unexpectedly,
  • One of my clients did not show up for her call
  • I got a bad score in a practicum

All these events threw me off track. I felt sad, unloved, stupid, unfairly judged and deserted, yes all the "yucky things"…. Normally I can take this as an adult and it would be ok, but this time it threw me back into being a 5 year old, feeling rejected and yelled at for something……………can YOU relate?

It took me 2 days to recover and it sucked all my creative energy out of my system. All I wanted to do was sleep, which I allowed myself to do and I did not force myself to do anything, I thought I needed to do.

For example tell myself that now I spent enough time feeling sorry for myself and it's time to get back to work……., no I just let it be. . After the 2 days I felt that my lights came back on and I was back to my adventurous self. So what was it?

Sometimes when we want to move ahead, make life experiments and try new things in life and businesses, "the play safe team" gets overwhelmed and wants to remind us to better play it safe. It creates challenges for us to say: don’t do this it’s not safe, this is too scary, I will not venture there, I rather stay where it's safe.

Because it’s the job of the "play safe team"  to keep us safe, not happy, not thriving, but SAFE. The good thing is; that the more we practice self-awareness or mindfulness, the easier it will be for us to feel what’s going on. If we can be very compassionate and loving with this scared part of ourselves, it will cooperative, the more love it gets, the faster it will recover πŸ™‚

What do YOU think, have YOU experienced something like this? What has helped YOU to get out?

How To Turn Work Time Into Fun Time

How To Turn Worktime Into Funtime

How To Turn Work Time Into Fun Time

Hello my friends, how are YOU doing? I hope life is treating you well, or if that's not the case that you find a way to make the best of it.

Some people wait for retirement to have fun…. no no no don't do that, make it fun now πŸ™‚

I am self-employed and work out of my home office, which is great, but sometimes I like to be around people. It’s so important to have fun at work and find ways to create an environment that inspires the creative juices to flow.

In the spirit of play I took myself to my favorite bookstore, ordered a cup of Cappuccino, and enjoyed the beautiful view of the old cathedral, the tall trees and the people streaming by below. The cloud formations floating across the sky were like pieces of art……….  

All this inspired me to write and I thought to myself: I am so lucky to be able to work like this. It was so easy to write, the words just kept flowing out of nowhere onto my paper.

Other times I go to the library to work on my laptop, which is another favorite place to have "fun at work." It’s a great place to take a break and look at books or magazines to get inspired in between.

Creativity and playtime need to be nurtured and it’s much more fun to work when creativity is flowing, so it’s important to come up with creative ways to do that. Sometimes we can’t draw it out of ourselves, but need to do little things to invite inspiration.

  • Meditation is a great way to get into the creative zone
  • Listen to your favorite music
  • Go for a walk in between to clear you head
  • Take regular breaks
  • Talk to some fun people

Some parts of work might not be fun……. period, but instead of complaining about it nonstop and giving it all this nasty, negative energy, try to make the best of it and change your perspective about it. YOU will see that it's a lot easier to just do it and then voila, it’s done. Now you just have to pat yourself on the back big time!

Mastermind groups of like minded, fun people are also a great way to have fun and get more ideas. We are communal beings and need the connectedness and exchange with others. This is a great way to practice connecting and exchanging………………Now I'm running out of ideas, the ball is in your court now πŸ™‚

What helps YOU to have more fun at work? Please leave a comment to share your insight, we love to read it.

 

Oh, I almost forgot, check out my "Dive into a Great New Life Experience" it's my gift to you.

Two 45 minute coaching sessions, a fun assignment in between and a great follow up.

Just do it! It's never too late to have a great life πŸ™‚

email me at maritasteffe@gmail.com to schedule your appointment

 

Dive Into A Great New Life

 

dive into a great new life

Dive Into A Great New Life

Hello my friends, yes I am talking to YOU!  Are you ready to dive? Are you sick and tired of life the way it is and would like to explore something new?

So what happens to women over 40?

As long as the children are at home everything seems to be ok, but as soon as they leave, this nagging " what's next, or is this all there is," is knocking on the door.

Sometimes dramatic things happen, the marriage might not be working anymore, maybe death took a partner, maybe the career YOU had for a long time just isn't fulfilling enough, it’s too stressful, or maybe it's just this dream, that has been dangling out there and now it's time to pursue it……………………

What is it for YOU?

YOU might realize that life is short and even when YOU are successful and have all the material things, it might not satisfy YOUR heart’s desire. It's a time of searching and evaluating and it can be very confusing and crazy making. I know it was for me.

I remember going in spirals from the time I was 50, I tried several things, thought it was a good idea at the time but it really wasn’t.

Like a miracle, in the end every little piece of the puzzle brought me to where I am today. A huge part of finally getting there was to trust my intuition and learn to listen to the quiet hints and iintuitions I would get.

Well this might not apply to everybody, but I know it applies to lots of women. I have been talking to lots of them in Germany and the US, we talk at meetings, at events, on social media and so on.

If YOU are interested, I tell YOU a little bit about my time of searching and what I came up with: I had my first experience with life coaching when I was 50, I was fascinated but somehhow I forgot about it again and started doing other things. YOU know they were kind of practical, but not expressing my passion.

Somehow, when I was 57, I started taking classes at CoachVille to learn better communication skills, then I noticed oh, I love this life coaching thing and so I pursued a career as a professional life coach.

I realized that being immersed into deep, life changing conversations makes me come alive. It’s the most inspiring environment for me. Working with a coach has been a life changing experience in my life.

He helps me to focus on essentials, to value myself, keeps me on track, inspires me, believes in me and we also have a lot of fun designing a life and business game that works for me and my nature. I learned that I don't have to do it alone, what a freaking relief that was…………..:-)

Just in case YOU wonder why I’m telling YOU all this: it’s because when most people are left to their own devices it’s very hard to make changes. The bigger the game is, that we want to play in life, the more challenges appear, accompanied by fear and resistance.

If we think we have to do it all alone, most of us don’t do it…and yes, that's the end of the dream.

Don't let that happen!

A coach will help YOU to get out of YOUR own minds, help YOU to be aware of the possibilities, reminds YOU of YOUR potential, champion YOU through the challenges, believe in YOU when YOU don’t and helps to design actions that will get results.

PS: I just designed a new “Dive Into A Great New Life” experience, which will provide great value for YOU. It’s not one session but two and it’s my gift to you, wohooooooooo.

Let me give YOU an idea what we will do and to say the least I am very excited about offering it

Session one: Together we will determine what it is that “something” that you wanted to do for a long time?

Assignment in between session: I will give you instructions on how to make a powerful vision board.

Session two: We will discuss the vision board and look at YOUR environment to find out:

  • What needs to be eliminated,
  • What needs to be transformed 
  • What needs to be added in order to support your success.

YOU will get a sheet which will help you with the needed upgrade to your environment.

This could be a powerful first step to dive into a great life and this experience is my gift to YOU, e mail me  at maritasteffe@gmail.com to schedule YOUR time, YOU will need 2 times 30 minutes.

PS: I will be on a meditation retreat until 8/17, so you will not hear from me until the 18th.