Motivational stories Archives

The pain and beauty of letting go

This picture was taken, when the sun rose over Iceland in January of 2014. I was on my way back to Germany, after living in the San Francisco area for 35 years. That was four years ago and it took a lot of letting go. It was painful and it was beautiful and exciting at the same time.

Somehow most human beings want to hold on to everything they know. Letting go is to say goodby to belongings, people, believes and behaviors, illusions. Lots of things that that we got attached to.

People have a hard time letting go of their suffering. Out of a fear of the unknown, they prefer suffering that is familiar. Thich Nhat Hanh

At one point I thought… I did let go of everything I could let go of, but somehow there is always a little bit more 🙂

Letting go, letting go, letting go

I remember that I was paralyzed when I, bit by bit, let go of my beautiful home. My friends, my car and my work, my walks on the Pacific. All my belongings were reduced to fit into a ten by 10 storage. The rest went to a friend of mine who was delighted.

I held on to my bank accounts, my drivers license, my Post office box and my phone number, that was it.

Fast forward 4 years…2018, I let go of my PO Box and friendships that do not feel good anymore. Last year I let go of my business and as a result, I also had to let go of the need to be important, the need to have to proof myself by doing things.

Always a little bit more…

Over the past four years I even had to let go of the illusion of what I want my family to be like. Yeah the illusions are very hard to let go of 🙂

So many illusions that I hear and see in my environment, the ingredients for a “happy life”. The partner, the family, the career, the things one should have, the status symbols.

Well, somehow I let go of most of them, it´s not important any more. Now I focus on what really nourishes me and makes me happy. Lots of spiritual work, a course in miracles, 12 step groups, 5 rhythm dancing, expressive painting, mantra singing and my studies of human design.

My search for something that inspires and stimulates me. I had to let go of everything in order to find what nourishes my spirit. As long as I make that a priority, I feel good.

Express yourself

So how do I do that? I trust the universe that I get whatever I need at the time when I need it. This trust helps me to let go and to be open to see and feel all the things that might be a sign to follow.

For me life is like a giant puzzle, lots of little pieces that at one time do not make much sense, but all of a sudden the realization that every piece is important in the grand scheme of life.

How does it work for you? What helps you to let go?

How to Improve your Personal Environment

How to Improve your Personal Environment

Hello again, I hope you are well and enjoying your life. Right now nature is exploding with delicate green buds, days are getting longer, the sun is warming up the ground, birds are chirping away. What a wonderful time of the year.

Spring is always a great time for a nice cleaning, not just the cleaning of your home but also looking at your relationships, bodies, mind and spirit. In this blogpost we look at your physical environment. The next blogpost will be about your body and appearance.

It´s a great opportunity to evaluate what works and what does not work in your immediate environment, the result will be increased life energy for the things you want to do and to help you create the life you love

Your physical environment

Let´s look at your home and workspace:

Are you happy with the way your home and office looks and feels?

No matter what the answer is, just start with a nice cleaning, use a good environmentally safe cleaner, with essential oils to make it more pleasant. Open the windows to let in fresh air, put on your favourite music and let´s start. While you do this, look at everything and ask yourself the following questions.

Is there any clutter that makes you feel bad, but you ignore it?
Are there repairs that you just do not get around to?
Is anything missing?
Anything that can be let go of?

Yeah, it´s amazing how much stuff gets accumulated but, do you need it all? Probably not. What I really love is the Feng Shui principle that when empty space gets created, the void will attract something new into your life. What a wonderful concept that always helps me to let go of stuff.

Broken things and messes drain your energy. Yes it´s true… you just have to be aware and mindful of how you feel and what gives energy and what takes energy. Practicing mindfulness or being aware of everything inside and outside yourself is a huge part of living a happy, fulfilled life.

Try a little experiment and see how it makes you feel, give it your total awareness. Clean up something, fix something or get rid of something and feel the energy in your body.

How does it feel?
What changed?
Do you have more energy?

One more practical tip: I always have 2 bags and one box around, one bag for stuff to give away, one bag for garbage and a box for stuff that I do not really need but still want to hang on to. I list the items on the box and put a date on. If I have not needed it after a year I go through again and might want to let it go. This is an ongoing process and it´s real fun.

Here are two example from my life

I broke the glass container of my blender about 6 months ago. Somehow it really bothered me that I had to buy a new one. Sure I tried to go to some local shops to buy it but it was not available. One salesperson gave me the website to order the part…that was about 4 months ago.

Despite the many occasions where I needed a blender and feeling bad about not doing it, I still have not gotten around to it. Last week I started a detox and really needed one, so I finally ordered it online. I cannot tell you how good that felt, not to have to think about the blender anymore, it freed up energy for other things.

Another little example for fixing something: When my internet was installed the cable guy needed to install a new jack, but they were only allowed to connect the cables coming out of the wall, so the jack was just hanging there.

I had to get my handyman to install it, which took me about 7 months and I finally did it this months. The joy I felt after it was done was exhilarating. Now I can walk by this part of the room and feel good. Before there was always the nagging thought: Marita this looks sloppy, get it fixed, why don´t you do it?

The feeling after something is done is fabulous and I never understand why it took me so long. Does this happen to you? Let me know if this was helpful? Do you have a good tip you would like to share? Please leave a comment.

Ps: Some ideas in this post are inspired by the world power method of my wonderful school Coachville New York

How to Grow Up When Over 50

how to grow up when over 50

How to grow up when over 50

Hello my friends, it took me a long time to write this post as I spent some time traveling. But here it is…. you might wonder about this strange title….

Normally people at 50 and over should be grown up… But guess what… there are many occasions when that is not the case, actually I would say that most “normal people “are emotionally immature, which is another way to say not grown up.

I know because it´s part of my story… So… why is that? I constantly meet new people in 12 step programs, personal development seminars, meditation courses and other events and places where people might go when they are not happy with themselves and or others.

Naturally there are many middle aged and older human beings over 50, who think of themselves as the eternal victims, children that have been harmed and adults that have been wronged. Yes, yes and mostly that is the truth…. but the problem is that if you always thinking of yourself as a victim, you are not willing to take responsibility for your own life and that is painful.

Through my own experience of feeling like a victim and you guessed right: I was around 50. That´s when I was ready to learn that I can only grow up and be content and fulfilled when I am willing to take responsibility for my life and stop complaining and blaming….ouch.

Blaming others for my misery and unhappyness, instead of leaving a situation that was not healthy for me, taking my life into my own hands and just moving on to pursue the things I was interested in.

Finally it happened and guess what, I was 50 and it was very hard. There might have been a softer way to do it, but the way I did it was very painful.

So painful that my therapist at the time begged me to go on antidepressants, because he was afraid I would harm myself…. Well for whatever reason, I needed to go through this pain and eventually got out of the dark into the light.

I totally changed my life, took up a new career that I loved, changed my environment. After a while I let go of toxic people whenever I could and limited contact with negative people as much as possible.

I still chose to have contact with some… like close family members, but in a detached way, accepting them the way they are and not expecting them to change.

It´s a process of letting go, accepting, learning and it feels good that way. I felt like the victim most of my life, but eventually when I understood that it´s not good for me.

The way I saw the world was different and oh my god it changed my life. Whenever I don´t like what others say or do, I always ask myself why it upsets me and normally I do the same thing myself.

So if you read this article and you feel like a victim, maybe try and accept things for what they are and find out what steps you can take to do things that are good for you. Look at your environment…

What is working?
What is not working?
Who is making you feel good?
Who is making you feel bad?
What´s a mess in your life?
What are you constantly complaining about?
What can you change?

The answers to all these questions will give you clues about your life. First you start with accepting the fact that it is whatever it is. Which does not mean you give up, it means that you accept the things you cannot change and change the things you can. In order to do this you have to get quiet enough that you can actually tell the difference try a simple meditation practice that will help you.

The next step is to find simple solutions to start eliminating the energy drains and messes from your life. Sometimes it´s hard to do this, it hurts people when you don´t want to spend time with them, but it will be worth it. If people drain your energy, limit exposure. Life is always changing and nothing will ever be the same.

Human beings have a hard time to accept this and want the opposite, to stay in their comfort zone and keep everything the same, but it´s actually outside of your comfort zone where a fulfilling life begins.

I would like to invite you to try it, move out of your comfort-zone into a new adventure, be willing to experiment, be grateful for whatever reasons you can find to be grateful for, it´s a simple practice that can change your energy in a second.

Oh and one more thing…observe your thinking and whenever you catch yourself thinking in a negative or mean way, just drop it and replace it with something that feels good.

Are you willing to try? I love to read your comments, please let me know your thoughts and how YOU take responsibility for your life, how do YOU change your energy?

Simple Strategy to Stick to New Years Resolutions

Simple Strategies to Stick to New Years Resolutions

Simple Strategies to Stick to New Years Resolutions

I hope you are in good spirits and excited about 2016. I sure am because… good things are coming. But now I have a thought or two about the famous New Year Resolutions.

Here we are again…it´s a few weeks into the New Year, the gym is packed, my favorite class is overcrowded… what happened? This phenomena happens every year, people create resolutions just to drop them 4 weeks later? It must be some kind of insanity as Albert Einstein stated in his quote 🙂

Doing the same thing over and over again, expecting a different result is the definition of insanity

Please don’t get me wrong, I am not saying that I don´t do this… but I´m aware of it. I think it´s kind of a herd thing….As soon as the end or the beginning of the year comes around and everybody creates New Year resolutions… I have to do it too.

Yeah it feels good….we have the best intentions until we decide otherwise and they are put on ice again until next year and then the same game starts again. Can you relate?

So what’s the problem?

New Year Resolutions normally reflect short-term thinking, or a quick fix, instead of having a long term plan, that’s why only a small percentage of those who make resolutions achieve their desired goals….Now that’s not a good success rate.

So is there a reason people don’t stick to their resolutions? Professionals’ answers are mixed. Some believe that many don´t have a strategy or someone to keep them accountable and support them to achieve these “goals“. But there is a way to empower yourself and stick to your new years resolutions.

Below are some strategies that will help you keep your resolutions Steven Covey, the author of “The Seven Habits of Highly Effective People “ once said, “Some habits of ineffectiveness are rooted in our social conditioning toward quick-fix, short-term thinking.” This is how I feel about resolutions: As the CEO of a strategic marketing firm, my New Year’s Resolution is not to have one. As an individual, could I say that I plan to improve myself in 2016? I certainly strive for that on an on-going basis, but not that the start of each year. That too is a marathon, not a sprint.

Be clear with your goals:

If you want to be healthier what does that mean for you? Exercise, eat healthier foods? Meditate, work less? Let’s just ake the example of healthier foods.

What’s on the list of foods that’s not good for you?
Are you willing to find a healthier replacement?
Are you willing to change some habits?

The key is to make it work for YOU…when you make a shopping list please…. write down things that you like to eat, don’t write down spinach and whole grain noodles if you hate them. Make it a habit to write a grocery list, with healthy foods, that you like. If you have only chips, soft drinks and junk food at home it’s impossible to eat healthier.

Would you like to move more? Think about exercise that you would like to do, there must be something. Sometimes it’s easier to go for walks, go on a bike ride be in nature, or take fun classes, than to work on machines. Although I like the machines because I listen to interesting audios at the some time.

Keep track

What did you eat today?
What kind of exercise did you do?
What did you do that is good for you?

Try to do 3 things every day towards your goal, even small things. Write down how you exercised, or what you ate….. if we keep track of something it’s easier to manage. Just simply tracking how much you are….or aren’t…doing, will push you in the right direction. If you didn’t do well…please just forgive yourself and try again….make it an experiment, there is no fail there is only: I try again!!!

Be accountable to someone

This will motivate and inspire you, just tell someone you trust about your endeavour, work out with a trainer, take a class, do something with a friend or get a coach. Start a little accountability group where everybody can work on their own resolution, but you still watch out for each other’s goals. All this takes you out of your “alone zone” and it will be more motivating if you are not left to your own devices.

If you break your resolution today, try again tomorrow. Voltaire.

Do it one step at a time and forgive yourself if you think you didn’t do it right. Try again and again and again and again until eventually you will establish a new habit. New habits get easier, because after doing something for a while new neural pathways get established in the brain.

Lots of luck to YOU and I hope this article will help you a little bit, but no matter what…don’t give up. To finish this up, please remember to celebrate your successes whenever you made a little step towards your goal celebrate…Take yourself on a date, get your nails done, buy some chocolate, go to a nice café and have a cup of tea or coffee. Go to the spa, do something nice for you. Will ya 🙂

Talk to you next time 🙂

Why Blogging Will Create More Visibility For Your Business

I am so excited to write this post….Now don’t get me wrong, I am not the “Mrs perfect, expert blogger”…..But I’ve been blogging for the last 4 years and know it's powerful. In the process I also discovered writing as a creative outlet, wohoooo how great is that. Before I forget…. please forgive my twisted english and misspells, as it’s not my first language 🙂

Today I'm writing in a coffee shop with a view of the old city hall. The farmers market is set up with lots of stands offering delicious veggies, fruits, fish, meet, chesse and scented flowers. The smell of deep fried fish and spices is in the air….ah, life is good.

Ok now back to blogging…My first blog, which was about vision boards….would show up on page 2 of google after only 3 months, which was a real achievement…Ok, now I would love to share with YOU what I learned and why blogging ins helpful for your business.

Over the last few years I have participated in lots of classes, seminars, mastermind groups and so on, enjoying the chance to connect with many people who desire to have a more global business presence and live their life purpose, doing the work they love to do.

After talking to lots of wonderful human beings…I now have a good picture about the most common problems, when starting and/or growing a business online. So what do you think are the most common problems when starting a business?

Yes you are right, you need to find customers, so you have to be visible and no…they don't come out of the blue, even if that’s what some law of attraction gurus tell you. Believe me I tried this strategy for a long time and it did not work. Unfortunately you need to apply certain actions and strategies to be found… otherwise you will get lost in the jungle of other websites.

Your potential client has no idea that you are out there with your wonderful service or product. As a result you might think that nobody is interested in what you have to offer……but it might just be a problem of being visible.

Just to throw this in as a sidenote: People sometimes don’t do the necessary actions, but are unconscious about the fact that they don’t do them. The result is that they think… their efforts are not working…… This process is unconscious and it’s a mind strategy to keep you safe, within your comfortzone.

Do I hear you say? This is crazy? Yes it is…but it’s true……. Try this experiment, be mindful and watch yourself…. Being aware of it myself and many other coaches I talk to, I actually noticed myself doing this…. I hate to admit… Has this ever happened to you?

When starting or growing a business, one of the most important things you need to do in order to become known and attract customers is to create visibility. Most of you know how to do it for your brick and mortar businesses… Advertise in the yellow pages, gazettes, magazines, word of mouth, go to networking events and the whole shebang. But what about online?

If you follow the online marketing gurus, which I did, they all say: start a blog and write posts….. Oh my… how to set up a blog, write, social media….No clue what to do, so many options, don’t know where to start. I was in total overwhelm.

Yep I know what it feels like, I’ve been there…..When I started I was perplexed, I was not very techie on the computer. I never saw myself as a writer, I never thought I’m good at writing, but I just did what they told me to do and guess what, after I got over the resistance I started to enjoy it 🙂

Now what are the technical benefits? By writing blogposts on a regular basis, Google will think your website is more active. With every indexed page (new blogpost) you add, there is one more chance to show up in the search engines, so it’s a fantastic tool to create organic SEO and drive free traffic to your site.

I will not get into SEO, but websites like hubspot, or other experts will be a great source of more technical information. Just google experts in SEO and you will find great information, even for free. My worpress site also has a great Plugin to help with SEO.

The blog content will be available for as long as you have your blog, so if people are searching for something you write about, it will take them to your blogpost, even years after you wrote it.

The other great benefit is that you have your own original content to share on social media, so if people get to know you through reading your blog they start to trust you and if you engage enough they eventually convert to customers and clients.

Write about subjects that helps solve their pains. Yeah, it’s always about that, you have something…. they need this something and boom, if the 2 connect it can be a match made in heaven. Write what you are interested in, be personal, make it fun to read. Nobody likes to read boring "manuals".

You will need a weblog, social media setup and a good linkedIn profile and if you use it regularly it will create interest and customers for you, the key is to post on a regular basis, not once a year, that would not be enough. If you don't know how to do it get help, get a coach, a tutor, or start a mastermindgroup.

Find out about your client's pain and write about a solution to this pain or challenge. Now you have an interesting subject to write about, something that your customers are interested in. First you find a good theme, then you need a great title. What would people google who have this pain? Your title should reflect the answer to this pain, so do some research on google. How to find a great title for your blog.

Simple recipe, isn’t it? For example; if you’re a business or life coach you want to know

Who do you want to coach
What’s keeping them from doing the things they want to do

Let’s say your customers are women over 40 who are looking for a new life direction. What would their problems be?

They might have an idea what they are passionate about, but they don’t know how to realize it. They feel stuck, they might be afraid to leave their comfort zone, or their environment might not support them.

Now you can write about that, or how people can balance their lives, be healthier, more courageous, more successful, more confident, and more. Offer them tips and tricks, be the light at the end of the tunnel. Anything that might be of interest to “your tribe.”

Ps: I love to go write in different cafes, or at the library, it’s stimulates and inspires me to have people around, plus it’s more fun.

Ok my friends I hope this helps a little, if you feel stuck and need some help, take advantage of my “Coaching to help you move forward trial session”, it’s my gift to you, just

e mail me at maritasteffe@gmail.com

If you are inspired to add something to this post, or you have a question, please leave a comment, I love to read them 🙂

What The Heck Is An Afformation?

What the heck is an affirmation and what does it have to do with a vision board? If you think afformation is mistyped, let me assure you: it is not.

There are affirmations and afformations, read the article below by Noah St John and you will understand the difference and why afformations are even more effective than affirmations. Well I actually do both versions it keeps my mind busy with positive stuff. For a vision board to be effective it is necessary to believe that we can achieve what we want and to find a way for our unconscious to achieve our life goals, so how we phrase it of most importance.

Noah St. John is the Author of SecretCodeBook.com. more about Noah at the end of this post

We all know that an “affirmation” is a statement of something you want to be true in your life. So an example of a traditional “affirmation” might be: “I am rich.”All right, let’s try it. Say to yourself right now, “I am rich.” Did you hear what just happened in your mind? A voice… a voice that said: “Yeah, right!”

The plain truth is that most of us don’t believe our own “affirmations”. Why? Because we’re trying to convince ourselves of something we don’t believe is true.

Now, traditional success teachers realized that you may not believe your “affirmations”. So they told us to repeat our “affirmations” a thousand…er, million…uh, kajillion times until you eventually, um, believe them.

Have you ever said positive “affirmations” (for example, “I am rich, I’m happy, I have enough”)… and then had… Absolutely nothing happen?

Me too. And about a gazillion other people. I was in the shower one morning, thinking about how the human mind is always in the process of asking and seeking the answers to questions.

For example, if I asked you, “Why is the sky blue?” – instantly, your brain would start searching for the answer. So I asked myself, “If the human mind is always asking and searching for the answers to questions, why are we going around making statements we don’t believe? Why don’t we cut out the middleman?”

Then I asked, “What would that look like?” I realized that if we make a statement (“affirmation”) that says, “I am rich” and our brain replies, “Yeah, right!” the question might look something like this: why am I so rich?

Come again?

Why am I so rich?

Try it. Right now, ask yourself, “Why am I so rich?” What’s your brain doing right now? Searching for the answer!

Remember Universal Law – “As you sow, so shall you reap”. Most people are unconsciously asking lousy questions, like: “Why am I such a loser? Why can’t I do anything right? How come I’m so lonely?

Why don’t I have enough money?” Guess what they reap? The fruits of what they’ve sown! And that’s how, on that fateful morning, I discovered and named the process of using afformations. Afformations are my discovery of empowering questions (NOT “affirmations”) that cause your mind to focus on what you really want, and stop focusing on what you don’t want.

Here are some examples of Afformations that my students have used with amazing results:

Why am I allowed to be, do and have all that I want in life?

Brandon, an insurance salesman in Salt Lake City who’d spent $30,000 on self-help programs with few results, started using this Afformation in May. In 30 days, his sales tripled – and by the end of the year, his revenues had increased more than 560% and he was named Agent of the Year.

Why do I lose weight so easily?

Monee had tried every diet program out there, but couldn’t lose weight. She began using this Afformation – and lost 20 pounds in 60 days without stress or dieting.

And one of my favorite Afformation stories…

Why am I so enchanting?

7-year-old Adrienne from Alabama came home crying to her mother, Joan, sobbing, “Why does everyone hate me?” Joan, who had read my books, told Adrienne, “Honey, you’re asking the wrong question!” She explained Afformations to her daughter, who started afforming, “Why am I so enchanting?”

Adrienne would repeat her Afformation over and over, out loud. Then one day, she came home from school with a picture one of her classmates had drawn – it was a heart with two little girls holding hands that read, “I’m so glad we’re friends!” When I asked Joan how long it had taken for Adrienne’s transformation to take place, she told me – less than one week!

Afformations are an incredibly powerful method I’ve taught people since 1997 to change your questions and change your life. In Part Two of this series, I’ll show you the simple 4-step Afformations Method to manifest anything you really want twice as fast with half the effort. So check back tomorrow for that one.

Noah St. John, Ph.D. is Founder of www.SuccessClinic.com and inventor of Afformations. He’s also the author of the new book The Secret Code of Success: 7 Hidden Steps to More Wealth and Happiness (Collins). You can get the first three chapters of Noah’s Secret Code Book (free) and connect with other Secret Code readers at http://www.SecretCodeBook.com. For a 60-Second Afformation Stress Buster (free), go to http://www.iAfform.com

I think it's a great principle, I tried it and it is easy enough to practice. I suggest if you want to be happy and live in abundance, this is a worth a try, what can you loose? All these simple practices help to reprogram our limited thinking and replace it with positive thinking. We can do what we want to do, we can be successful and we have the power to create our lives. We can create our lives, we just have to believe in it.

Do you have an inspiring story you would like to share? I am looking for guest bloggers:

Who? women over 40 who changed their lives and finally allowed themselves to do do what they love to do.

What? Either a blog post about the change or a good vision board story. Click here for more information.

Great Tips On Making Your Dreams Come True

Great video by Jack Canfield, he is one of the pioneers in positive thinking. If you feel your life is not working and you are really tired of it, watch this video. Jack always has some great simple tips that can will help you create your life, help you make your dreams come true and achieve your life goals. Learn a new habit and practice it every day, inspire your creative-self. Every day is the key, not once in while, not only when you remember, it has to be on a regular basis, in order for it to work. Most of the things we learned growing up, are not helpful any more, so it's a good idea to replace old patterns, which are not working with new patterns that are working. You want to be happy? This is a way to happiness, it requires work but it's worth it. Create a vision board, keep a running journal of what you desire.

httpv://youtu.be/sZQkrqKCY1s

Creating a vision board and using a vision board as much as possible is also a great practice to focus on the things you want. The more time we spend focusing on the things we want, the more things will manifest in your life. It's a way for your unconscious to find ways to find ways to manifest your dreams.

Do you have an inspiring story you would like to share? I am looking for guest bloggers:

Who? women over 40 who changed their lives and finally allowed themselves to do do what they love to do.

What? Either a blog post about the change or a good vision board story. Click here for more information.

My new creative adventure: A membership site: Creative Life Now

"Nourish your spirit" is the motto. How to find joy and fulfillment in life, in a community of like minded women. Click the blue link, or the image to join our community of women at Creative Life Now. Are you looking for, support, friends, ideas, tips, motivation and inspiration? The subjects are: Creativity as meditation, Vision Boards, Collages and Creative Writing. Let's support each other and share ideas. A melting pot of experts in the fields of Creativity and Healing, Vision boards, Collages and Creative Writing and women seeking expert advice and inspiration.

What Is The Key To Happiness?

We all want to know how to be happy, don't we? What is it, how can we get it? I came to belief that it does not have anything to do with what I have, but it's a state of peace and content inside of me. I make a lot of vision boards, read a lot about vision boards and happiness comes up all the time. I dedicated a whole vision board to happiness, it reminds me to be happy, I practice it, I know I always have a choice. I found this article by Allen Gregoire and thought you might like it.

The role of the mind: An inside job

This may seem like a fairly obvious truth but, happiness and suffering all originate in the mind. Despite such an obvious truth, many insist that their happiness lies "out there" and that their suffering is also the result of some external force beyond their control. Once we understand how our mind works and we come to terms with the fact that we can indeed control our mind, our daily reality becomes much different.

Each of us, at some moment in our lives, has either knowingly or unknowingly detached ourselves from any emotional involvement in the face of a particular challenge or adversity. It is in these moments, that an illuminating lesson is presented to us. If our conscious mind has been listening, we realize that the only power anything has over us is the power we give it. The mere knowledge that you can revoke that power at any time is liberating mentally, emotionally, and spiritually.Speaking of detachment, one of the key principles of happiness centers around your "focus". What you choose to focus on has an enormous impact on your happiness and well being. Are you one of those people who consistently sees the good in people or are you instead focused on human "failings"? It's true that both good and bad exist in all people but, which side of the fence you choose to look at will govern your view, your life experience, and your happiness.

Another aspect of focus has to do with things within your "circle of influence". Those things and situations in which you can have a direct impact and some measure of control over are your circle of influence. Often, we spend too much time and energy on things that we can have little or no impact on. In doing so, we end up frustrated, exasperated, and unhappy. Focus instead on those things you can do something about. With a measure of success one feels satisfied and therefore, happy.

Another viewpoint comes from the practice of Buddhism. One of the key tenets is not to become attached to things or outcomes. It is our attachment or coveting of things and our desire for certain outcomes that can be a great source of suffering. When you take the view that everything happens as it should and you have faith that events are unfolding in a way that helps you fulfill your destiny, you are filled with a sense of peace and calm and the unease of "wanting" subsides.

The organizing principles of happiness

1. Taking care of mind and body: You must always stand guard at the gate to your mind. You must be extremely vigilant at this as negative intruders are lurking and waiting for the weakest moments when they can storm the gate to your soul. When the attack comes, you must be quick to respond and defeat the enemy. Also, it is important through nutrition and exercise to keep the body strong so that you have the tools and the will to fight the good fight. Body and mind are interdependent, there is no getting around that.

2. Positive social circles: It is extremely important to associate with those whose presence is uplifting. Take care to associate with those who generally have a positive outlook on life. Don't underestimate the effect of associating with negative people and don't delude yourself into thinking that you are so strong that their negativity will not affect you. It's okay to help people but, also understand that no matter the amount of help, some people will never possess the awareness to manage their lives and their own emotional states. Give yourself the gift of association with positive minded people.

3. Live in accordance with your own moral code: At all times, ensure that your actions reflect your moral beliefs. Sometimes, it is tempting to set those beliefs aside because of things like convenience or social acceptance or avoidance. But, it is YOU who will always know that you did not act in accordance with your beliefs. This will create a sense of uneasiness in you that your soul will never let you forget. However, the peace and happiness that comes with standing up for your convictions is priceless.

"The secret of happiness is freedom, and the secret of freedom, courage". – Thucydides

In other words, have the courage to stand up for your principles. If you don't, your heart and your soul die a little bit every day. It isn't worth it to compromise your principles.

4. Giving to others: Something profound happens to us when we take a moment to step outside of our own world and enter the world of others through giving. When you give of yourself to another, that gift is automatically doubled and now becomes two gifts, one for the recipient and one for you. Giving feels good and reaffirms your worth as a human being. That you would think of another so selflessly is a testament to the power of love and good in this world. You realize that you have the power to bring a ray of sunshine and happiness into someone else's life. What a beautiful source of happiness!

5. Purpose, goals, and direction: It's been said in various ways that a life without purpose is a life not worth living. One of the primary sources of happiness centers around our meaning or our place in the world. What is your purpose in life? Is it to fight for and secure justice? Is it to alleviate the suffering of others and care for them? Is it to promote peace in the world? Is to create something of beauty for the world to enjoy?

In Viktor Frankl's book, Man's Search For Meaning, he explains that the primary human drive is not pleasure but the pursuit of what we find meaningful. It was this emphasis that allowed Mr. Frankl to survive his experiences in Nazi death camps. His focus on how he could and ultimately would find meaning in his life enabled him to "escape" mentally from the daily horrors that were his life in the camp.

6. Love for yourself and others: It's been said that there is no greater force in the world than love. It's also true that it's a tremendous source of happiness. When you feel good about yourself and truly love yourself, how can you not experience happiness?

When you love others and feel that love in return, how can one not experience a state of happiness? When you give of yourself to others and demonstrate that love through your actions, you are responsible for creating a source of happiness in that world. Whose happiness have you contributed to today?

Happiness is a state available to all but it requires a little bit of effort just like everything else in life. But, with the right amount of control over your own mind and emotional states and by utilizing the organizing principles set forth above, you can find your own key to happiness.

An enduring fascination with peak performance systems and human motivation and achievement led Allan Gregoire to a career as an author. The author has worked in the resort industry, financial services, and the legal profession. The author writes content for his website http://actionmaxims.com, a site devoted to exploring your calling and destiny and achieving high levels of success.

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Allan Gregoire has some very good points, happiness depends on how you perseive things, the world or your- self and how you look at all this can be changed, a different view on life can be practiced. I know it because I did it and so can you. It's all a practice and you can get help and work with a good therapist, life coach, EFT or NLP practitioner, or a good spiritual guide etc. We are so lucky that we ave all these wonderful choices these days.

Let me know what you think and how you practice being happy, leave a comment at the end of the post, we love interaction.

Do you have an inspiring story you would like to share? I am looking for guest bloggers:

Who? women over 40 who changed their lives and finally allowed themselves to do do what they love to do.

What? Either a blog post about the change or a good vision board story. Click here for more information.

My new creative adventure:A membership site: Creative Life Now

All About Mind Power

Marita here, I am obsessed with the power of mind, it is such an important part in the creating and power of vision boards and how to live a great life. If we learn to control our mind and use it to our benefit and not be used by it life will be a bowl of cherries. Great article, thanks to the Author for writing it.

Mind power is the ability to direct and focus the power of mind to create specific outcomes in life.

Mind power is not magic. Mind power is not about being able to make someone else do something they don't want to do. Mind Power is not about controlling another person's mind or imbedding your thoughts, beliefs, memories or images in another person's mind.

Mind power is personal. Mind power is something that you work with personally to create a specific outcome that you want.

When the mind is focused, directed and working toward a specific goal you begin to tap into the power of the mind. This kind of mind power works in conjunction with the subconscious mind. The mind can directly impact the subconscious mind with

thoughts and repeated phrases. This is the real power of the mind. It has the ability to interact with the subconscious mind.

Once you understand the power of the mind you can begin to develop your mind power.

You can begin to work with mind power to create specific outcomes that you want in life. There are specific techniques and methods that you can apply to develop mind power so that you are directing the power of your mind and subconscious mind to help

you achieve specific goals.

I outline all of these techniques in my free mind power e-course. All you have to do is register today and you'll also get my mind power mp3 download – which gives you all the techniques you need to direct your mind power so that you achieve the

success you want.

To work with mind power correctly you should pay attention to your thoughts and beliefs. Your thoughts and beliefs are the real power behind mind power. Because these shape your views on the world and eventually dictate what actions you will take. If you believe it's difficult to make money then you will take actions that make it difficult for you to make money. In this example – you're actually applying mind power to create what you don't want – more financial struggle.

Now you can turn things around and being applying mind power to make it easier for you to make money by changing your thoughts and beliefs.

You see your thoughts and beliefs are picked up by the subconscious mind. The subconscious then goes out and creates the situations that appeal to you that mirror what you believe and think.

The real power of the mind is in the ability to change those thoughts and change those beliefs. When you work with mind power you realize that you are in control of your mind. You have the power to change thoughts that don't help you succeed. You have the power to create new beliefs. Once you plant new thoughts and beliefs in your mind you begin to direct the power of your mind to work with your subconscious so that you enjoy greater success.

I hope this article was useful to you, I would like to end it with this quote:

"Men and women are not prisoners of fate, but only prisoners of their own minds.

– Franklin D. Roosevelt"

Now get out the poster board and use the creating power of your mind! Leave a comment and let me know how it goes.

Do you have a story you would like to share? I am looking for women over 40 who changed their lives and finally allowed themselves to do do what they love to do, or a good vision board story. Click here for more information.

"Nourish your spirit" is the motto. How to find joy and fulfillment in life.Click the blue link, or the image to join our community of women at Creative Life Now, my new membership site. Are you looking for creative community, ideas, tips, motivation and inspiration, how to find joy and fulfillment in life? Let's support each other and share ideas. A melting pot of experts and women seeking expert advice.

Women Over 40

Wonderful article, posted by Andy Rooney, written by Frank Kaiser.

From Frank Kaiser

As I grow in age, I value women over 40 most of all. Here are just a few reasons why:

A woman over 40 will never wake you in the middle of the night and ask, 'What are you thinking?' She doesn't care what you think.

If a woman over 40 doesn't want to watch the game, she doesn't sit around whining about it. She does something she wants to do, and it's usually more interesting.

Women over 40 are dignified. They seldom have a screaming match with you at the opera or in the middle of an expensive restaurant. Of course, if you deserve it, they won't hesitate to shoot you if they think they can get away with it.

Older women are generous with praise, often undeserved. They know what it's like to be unappreciated. Women get psychic as they age.

You never have to confess your sins to a woman over 40.

Once you get past a wrinkle or two, a woman over 40 is far sexier than her younger counterpart.

Older women are forthright and honest. They'll tell you right off you are a jerk if you are acting like one. You don't ever have to wonder where you stand with her.

Yes, we praise women over 40 for a multitude of reasons. Unfortunately, it's not reciprocal. For every stunning, smart, well-coiffed, hot woman over 40, there is a bald, paunchy relic in yellow pants making a fool of himself with some 22-year old waitress…

Ladies, I apologize.

For all those men who say, 'Why buy the cow when you can get the milk for free?', here's an update for you. Nowadays 80% of women are against marriage. Why? Because women realize it's not worth buying an entire pig just to get a little sausage!

Being in my later 50s I think "women are like good wine the older they get the better"!

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